Failing to find a fantastic time at university? You're not alone.
A student named Robert used up much of his freshers' week scrolling through social media, viewing updates about peers enjoying evenings out.
"I was just in bed," Robert recalls, characterizing that period as the loneliest time of his life.
Robert's flatmates rarely went out, and his studies didn't appear very sociable.
Despite putting himself out there by going to taster sessions for different clubs, he was unable to locate people he connected with.
"I began losing my self-esteem," he says. "It seemed that others weren't interested to form friendships with me, or they didn't appreciate me."
Digital Platform Contrasts
Initially, Robert wasn't considering of attending college and had a job offer for after sixth form.
Yet he saw his friends enjoying themselves as college students online.
"When you must rise for your job during the week at 9:00 and you observe peers partied on midweek, you do start thinking the grass is greener," Robert says.
Higher Education Assumptions
Media content and digital networks can idealize the notion of university living.
Numerous students come to university with great anticipations for what they imagine could be the best years of their lives.
Some students arrive at college with "optimistic perspectives," notes a counselling manager.
Research Results
- In a poll of new students initially, the main anxiety was finding their place and being accepted
- In another survey through polling organizations, 17% of students said they were without companions at university
- 37% said they experienced concern frequently about making friends
Individual Stories
A different attendee's online videos was populated with clips of girls having fun while sharing accommodation in college residences.
Yet when she relocated from her hometown to university to learn reporting, she found orientation period "overwhelming" because of the drinking culture it involved.
She avoids drinking and had never been clubbing before.
"I actually passed a lot of freshers' week in my room," she says. "I just felt a bit alienated."
Mental Health Considerations
In a 2025 survey of over ten thousand university attendees, a significant portion mentioned they thought about leaving university.
The primary factor was emotional state, followed by monetary worries.
"Concern over these multiple factors is massively common, and normal," notes a counselling expert.
Identifying Resolutions
Over periods, all three individuals gradually adjusted and built connections.
Alisha made friends via her studies and via social media, while another student became more content after being able to move in with friends.
Useful Suggestions
In his case, currently in his mid-twenties and in his concluding studies, it was engaging in performance groups and employment during studies that helped him make friends.
His recommendation to new attendees experiencing connection challenges is to just "get out of your room" and go to club and society taster events.
"Subsequent to periods of consistently showing up, individuals become familiar with you," he mentions, "you recognise theirs, and friendships begin forming."